It seems like the last few weeks could be summed up with illness, illness, illness. I was sick on Thanksgiving so we had Jack in the Box-don't judge, Elle has had three ear infections, Rylan has/had strep, scarlet fever, and an ear infection, Blake has an ear infection and the flu, and I have bronchitis and a sinus infection. I managed to make Christmas dinner for Kenny in shifts but when I wasn't in the kitchen I was in bed. Catching up on other things-I surpassed my goal with my Cotton Candy sale, thank you to all that made purchases last month. I was grateful to take it all to the bank yesterday and put together a bigger than expected money order(tearful story to follow). We are excited some neighborhood friends from California that moved to Keller Texas about a year ago are coming to spend the day with us tomorrow. They have three stair step babes like us and it will be so good for both families to have a little taste of home for an afternoon. I had a great birthday a couple weeks ago. Shopping and lunch with girlfriends, a date with my man, an all too quick lunch with a bestie, and time to myself! Oh and we moved October 30th! Love the new place and most importantly the kids couldn't be happier, probably even get along better with more space, an awesome playroom, and a great backyard. Now the teary part...
If you have been reading our blog I hope you have been following Noa's story and praying for the Rose family. As I said before I was doing a fundraiser sale at Cotton Candy to donate to the Roses. Many gave above and beyond their purchase totals and I know some donated directly via their blog. I hoped for a set amount and easily doubled it. My heart was full that strangers and friends were supporting our friends financially and prayerfully. I have "rough drafted" part of this post at least a dozen times with the words just out of reach. Noa's story did not end the way my heart longed for, but God's plan is not our own and my heart just hasn't come to terms with that yet. I struggle to share because I know words on a screen often don't come across the way we intend. I am by no means making this about myself, it is just such a delicate time and I don't want to taint it with my limited ability to put the right words together. Even this very moment I pause and pray that the words read here reveal the tender truth and nothing more. Getting back to yesterday. It took me longer than I expected to go to the bank, sick mom, sick kids, holiday obligations(silly), whatever else, but mostly I think I just was reluctant to go because I wished so desperately that I didn't have to. That all of this didn't need to be in the first place. That Noa's beautiful life was being shared with her family this side of heaven. I had three transactions to do at the bank and the money order was the last because I knew I would spill if they at all asked who it was going to or what it was for. When I gave the teller the amount she looked quizzical and when she said she waved the normal fee I expressed my gratitude and began to share just a tiny bit of Noa's story. I noticed the woman working at the drive up window was listening and starting to tear up. As the transaction was almost completed she walked to the woman helping me and said hold on a second and went to the back. She came out and stood next to me and handed the teller some cash and said, "I'm a customer at this bank and I want to add to this money order" I hardly had a voice and hugged her and said thank you. Now both of us were crying and I shared with her how amazed I was with her generosity and about the Cotton Candy fundraiser. She said she wished she could do more. She took a minute to compose herself before going back to her desk at the window. I expressed my appreciation again and how much it meant that a complete stranger was touched and acted upon it. I have never been in this branch before so she has never seen me. I was floored that with just a few words, honestly maybe thirty seconds of sharing she opened her heart and her wallet-literally. Maybe because I'm a girl and a crier, the whole thing was more tender, but it felt like a movie scene. It was fluid and beautiful as if someone had scripted it. And you know what, I believe that. I believe that the God that cares about the very hairs on my head, cares even more about my heart. Our family and friends have had some tragic and painful loss the last few months, losing a husband/father and a child are nothing I know first hand but my heart has been burdened for the people I love hurting so deeply. I started the season not feeling very into it because we did not have family coming nor were we going anywhere to be with family and after some rushed and crabby holiday shoppers, and the tragedy in Connecticut, the weeks before Christmas weren't especially cheery. The woman at Chase bank renewed my spirit in people and that there was actually good in the world. I believe I had a divine appointment that day with Stephanie at Chase bank on 620 and Wyoming Springs, I just didn't have it on my calendar, but thankfully He did. I love how He loves children. While the money was given to bless the Roses, it blessed me the same. I saw on facebook this idea of starting with an empty jar at the beginning of the year and putting notes of good things that happen through the year and reading them at the end of that year. I will absolutely be starting this in a few days and yesterday will probably go in, a few days early but oh well. It will be in the jar but I don't think I will ever forget it-I can see it like it's a movie I've watched over and over. I don't know her motivation for doing this but I am grateful.I am grateful for her generosity and I'm grateful for the restoration in my heart and to the one who orchestrated it all. Just as Mary pondered these things and treasured them in her heart, I am doing the same tonight. Happy New Year dear ones!
4 comments:
love your words...love you
Love it!
Love it! Thanks for posting!
Love it! Thanks for posting!
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